Tuesday, November 25, 2008

So This Is Where Your Narcissism Has Led You

...to a sad, gullible place where you search frantically hither and yon for the answer to humanity's most repulsive scourge -- aging.

Sure, now you're waking up with a cup of coffee and 20 LED lights radiating meaninglessly across your face. But it's not going to last, lady. Time makes ogres of us all. First you'll lose your lucrative gig at the beauty corporation. Then you'll fall behind on the payments for the Light Therapy System. Before you know it you're a hasbeen, watching Duckman reruns on USA and basking in the second-rate glow of pilfered alarm clocks and laser pointers while you wait on a phone call from a beauty agent that will never come. So enjoy your wall of fancy lights while you can, Miss. Moments like these are but embers in a waning fire.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I question whether she's savvy enough to watch Duckman Returns. I accuse her of Americas Top Model. As she closes her eyes she can hear the applause for her Ms. America speech.