Holy Pepperoni! Nice Bald Death Stare Small Ear Karate Pants. I Mean, Nice Abs!

The Ab Radical Abdominal Optimizer will get you thinking about everything but abs!

This'll Teach My Chin Not to Poop on the Good Carpet

FaceTrainer is "the only fitness device that applies the proven principals of resistance training to facial muscles." Also, it's made by a company called No!No!. The marketers behind this should Know!Know! better.

This Woman Has No Idea How to Use a Tampon

"The Tranquil Sounds Oxygen Bar replenishes, renews and rejuvenates you down to the cell. Headset delivers oxygen for easy concentrated inhalation." Barf.